Here's chapter 8 of "It's A Wrap!" Maddie apologizes for the two week wait for it and says she hopes to have the next one finished a bit quicker, but no promises as she is going away next week and probably won't have much time to write.
WEEK EIGHTEEN
“I can’t believe it’s just two weeks ‘till
you go back to work,” Meg says as we’re getting ready for bed Wednesday
evening.
“I know. Time’s flying by fast. In a way it
feels like we wrapped season four yesterday, but at the same time it feels like
it was a lifetime ago.”
“I know. It’s weird, isn’t it?” Meg says as
she climbs into bed while I wheel around it and position my chair and get ready
to transfer to bed.
Transfers have become second nature to me and
it’s something I do without putting much thought into. I’m glad I was in great
shape before my accident; it has made my recovery much easier than it would’ve
been if I had to start from scratch with building upper body strength. It
doesn’t take me long to get settled into bed and Meg curls up next to me and we
pick up the conversation.
“No, that certainly wasn’t the plan,” Meg
sighs. Then she perks up. “But I don’t think it has been all bad. We’ve still
been able to spend a fair amount of time together.”
“Agreed. I mean, I wish I hadn’t crashed my
bike and I don’t like to be paralyzed, but it is what it is and there’s nothing
we can do to change that. And I think some good has come out of it; I think you
and I have developed a closer bond than we’ve had before and we’ve made a great
friend in Joel.”
“Yeah, and I think it has been a good
learning experience for the kids as well.”
“Absolutely. I’m glad you’re still here by
the way. I know I haven’t always been pleasant to be around after the
accident.”
“Why do you even say that? It never crossed
my mind to leave you. I vowed to stay with you in sickness and in health when
we married and I love you more than you can ever imagine.”
“I love you too,” I say as I wrap my arms
around Meg and kiss her soundly. We end
up making love and an hour later we lay naked together in the rumpled sheets.
Over the past few weeks we’ve discovered
several new ways to satisfy each other despite my physical limitations. We
still haven’t tried to have intercourse. My doctor has given me a prescription
for Viagra, but I haven’t gone to the pharmacy to have it filled yet. I have
some sort of mental barrier against taking Viagra and I’m not sure how to get
past it. For now the prescription is sitting in a desk drawer and I have no
plans to have it filled anytime soon.
“I love you,” I mumble into Meg’s hair as she
curls up next to me and we soon drift off to sleep in each other’s arms.
…
The next morning I wake up much later than I
normally do and I realize I’m alone in bed. The bathroom door is open and Meg
isn’t in there either. I check the time. Almost nine. She’s probably taking the
kids to school. I’m about two hours behind my normal routine and know I need to
get up and to the bathroom. With a sigh I pull the covers back and I remember
I’m naked. Meg and I didn’t bother to get re-dressed after we made love last
night. I grab my t-shirt from the floor and place it on the seat of my
wheelchair before I transfer to it and wheel into the bathroom.
An hour later I’m showered, shaved and
dressed in a pair of soft, worn jeans and a navy blue Henley shirt with the
sleeves pushed up to the elbows. I grab a pair of sneakers from the closet and
put them on before I leave the master bedroom.
When I reach the kitchen I pour myself a mug
of coffee and grab my iPad from the charging station on the counter to check my
email and social media feeds, as well as the news. There’s nothing that demands
my immediate attention and I decided to go down and say hi to Joel. He’s been
living in the guesthouse for a couple of weeks now and the transition has gone
well so far. I’ve been very busy this
week so I haven’t been able to spend any time with him, but today I don’t have
any meetings or anything else on my schedule.
I wheel down the path through the garden to
the guesthouse and knock on the doorjamb. Joel’s voice comes through the door
and he tells me to enter. I find him and Justin, a PCA, by the kitchen table
where Justin is feeding Joel a bowl of cereal.
“Good morning,” I greet them.
“Good morning, Chris. How are you? Haven’t
seen you much this week,” Joel says between spoons of cereal. I take over from Justin
and he leaves the room.
“I’m good. Just busy with pre-production
stuff. It’s just over two weeks ‘til we start shooting season five.”
“I didn’t realize it was that soon,” Joel
says.
“We start shooting September 1st.
I fly to Toronto a couple of days before, to get settled into my place. How are
things with you? Are you still liking it here?”
“I’m great,” Joel says. “I really like living
here and so far everything has gone smoothly with my care too. I think I’ve got
a great team of PCAs that seem to work well together.”
“Glad to hear that,” I say. “Let us know if
you get sick of the kids. I know they’ve been down here quite a bit in the
afternoons since you moved in.”
“I don’t mind that,” he assures me. “I enjoy
their company and it’s fun to help them with their homework. It’s not like my
schedule is packed. I spend too much time watching TV, so it’s nice to get a
break from that.”
“Have you heard from Alan or any of your
co-workers since they surprised you with the van?”
“I’ve kept in touch with Nick and a couple of
the other guys that were there. They actually invited me to join them for
dinner and some end-of-the-week beers tomorrow evening.”
“That’s great, Joel! You’re going, right?”
“I don’t know. I’m afraid it’ll be really
awkward. I know I’m a spectacle; strapped into a power wheelchair with
ventilator tubes attached to my trach. And I’ll have to bring a PCA to help me
too. I don’t really know the guy that’s working tomorrow, Stephen, that well.
He’s a part timer and has only done a couple of shifts, so we’re still getting
to know each other.”
“I’ll go with you,” I offer spontaneously. “I
know the basics of your care and I’ve fed you countless meals over the past few
months.”
“Really?” Joel asks incredulously after he
has swallowed the last spoonful of cereal. I put the bowl aside.
“Yeah. Unless you think it’ll be awkward
since they probably know who I am.”
“They’ve actually been trying to get me to
introduce them to you. They’re kinda impressed that we’re friends,” Joel says
with a blush creeping up his cheeks. He seems a bit embarrassed to admit it.
“That settles it. I’m going with you. Stephen
will have to drive since your van doesn’t have hand controls.”
Joel chuckles. “Guess that’s an upside of
having PCA’s; I always have a designated driver.”
“Way to go, bud. Lookin’ at the bright side,”
I say as I pat his shoulder.
“I’ve realized that’s the way to go. Moping
around won’t make things better and I don’t wanna spend the rest of my life
being miserable. And lately good things have happened in my life; moving here,
the fundraiser by my co-workers… Things are looking up and I’m starting to
realize my life isn’t over or ruined. It’s just changed.”
“That’s how I look at things too,” I say. “I
don’t like to be paralyzed and of course I wish I hadn’t crashed my bike, but
what happened can’t be changed. There’s no point in wallowing in self-pity or
thinking about how thing could’ve been if I hadn’t broken my back. I’ve
accepted that I’m paralyzed and that won’t change.”
“I’m not sure if I’ve reached acceptance
yet,” Joel admits. “It’s hard to accept that I’ll never move my body again,
that I’ll always be completely dependent on other people to do what most people
take for granted. Like scratch my nose, eat or breathe for that matter. I feel
I’m getting closer though. Things are getting easier every day, but it’s still
hard.”
I nod and before I can say anything Joel
makes a funny face; it’s a telltale sign he’s got an itch somewhere on his face.
I give him a questioning look.
“Scratch the right side of my nose,” he says.
“My right that is. It’s crazy itchy.”
I do as he asks me to and soon he relaxes
again. “Thanks, Chris. Case in point I guess…” he says with a crooked smile.
“Yep. So, what’s your plan today?”
“Same as always; to sit around in my
wheelchair and watch some TV,” he says somewhat dejectedly. “Why do you ask?”
“Well, I don’t have plans today either, so I
thought I’d ask if you want to do something. We could get Justin to drive us to
a restaurant to have lunch or something if you’re up for it.”
He looks hesitant. “We can just hang out here
if you want to.”
“It’s just… I haven’t been out in public much
after the accident. I just hate how people stare at me like I’m some sort of
freak. I guess the bulky wheelchair and ventilator makes me a freak, but I
don’t like it at all. I hate being so self-conscious.”
“You’re not a freak, Joel,” I state firmly.
“One thing I’ve discovered over the past few weeks is that there are plenty of
people that are capable of seeing past the wheelchair. You want to meet up with
your co-workers tomorrow, right?”
“Yeah. I really wanna keep in touch with them
since I hope I can get back to working at least part time at some point. Alan
seems open to that and I know I’ll go crazy if I don’t have anything
constructive to fill my days with. And I don’t want to spend the rest of my
life as a hermit that never leaves the house.”
“That settles it. We’re going out for lunch. I’m
sure there’s some sort of food you’ve missed while you’ve been in the hospital,
I know I was craving lots of things when I got out of there.”
Joel smiles crookedly. “It’s totally
ridiculous, but one thing I’m really craving is a Big Mac,” he says.
I can’t stop a snort of a laugh from escaping
me. “Really? A Big Mac? Well, McDonalds it is then,” I say with a laugh.
“I told you it’s ridiculous,” Joels says.
“You probably don’t eat junk like that at all. I know you have to stay in
shape.”
“I eat junk occasionally. I don’t mind going
to McDonalds if that’s what you want. I just expected you to say something like
‘a good steak’,” I explain.
“Oh, okay. Well… I am really craving a Big
Mac, so if you’re sure…”
I cut him off. “McDonalds it is then,” I say
firmly. I check the time. It’s just after 10 am. “How about we head out at
noon? That should give you and Justin enough time to get ready, right?”
“Yeah, that sounds good to me.”
“Great! I’ll meet you by the van at noon.”
We chat for a few more minutes, then Justin
appears in the living area again and after informing him about our plans I head
back to the main house to reply to some emails while he and Joel gets ready.
…
I’m relieved that the McDonalds we’ve gone to
is relatively quiet. The people that are there do a good job at staring at Joel
and me as we enter. I know two guys in wheelchairs is a spectacle, especially
when one is a somewhat famous actor and the other is a vent dependent
quadriplegic. I wish it wasn’t the case, but it is.
Thankfully our lunch is pretty uneventful.
The cashier is immensely awkward when she takes Joel’s order, but by the end of
the transaction she seems a little more comfortable. I’m pretty sure Joel’s
smiles and little jokes puts her at ease. Apparently he has a knack for
self-deprecating humor.
After we’ve received our food we find a table
with room for our wheelchairs, especially Joel’s big bulky power chair can be a
challenge to navigate some places. Justin ends up feeding Joel, they agree that
he needs the practice and I don’t mind. We spend the meal chatting about a
variety of things and by the time we get back into the van Joel is pretty
happy.
“That went better than I feared,” he says as
I secure the seatbelt across him and Justin turns the key in the ignition.
We’re soon on the way back to the house and a few minutes later Justin parks
the van in its usual spot. I notice Joel looks wiped out and before I can say
anything he says he’s tired and wants to lie down for a bit. I bid them both
goodbye and head into my house while they head back to the guesthouse.
Awesome chapter!! Keep them coming :)
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